Gisteren heb ik tijdens het Rotterdamse festival De Wereld van Witte de With mogen genieten (en walgen) van het meest bijzondere diner dat ik ooit in mijn leven heb gezien. Kunstenaar Jonas Liveröd had voor de gelegenheid een diner van 14 gangen samengesteld, geheel geïnspireerd op Jorge Luis Borges' bekende classificatie van dieren. Bij deze het (deels) geïllustreerde menu: 


1. Those that belong to the Emperor
Sculpture cast in Mexican sugarskull style which should be licked until it disappears.

2. Embalmed ones
A fruit salad of sorts, crowned by our favourite stuffed Veberöd duck.


3. Those that are trained
The cat - a difficult animal in training - is here tamed upon a mountain of merengue drowned in chocolate and raspberry syrop.


4. Suckling pigs
Kroppkaka - a swedish which literally translated means body-cake - similar to the German/Austrian dish Knudel, made of potato with a smooth filling of chopped red mushrooms.

5. Mermaids
Live eels guard the little medicine bottles filled with our favourite French drink pastis


6. Fabulous ones
A gaspacho bloody mary served in a raggle-taggle mix of unique second-hand glasses

7. Stray dogs
Noodles soaked in octopus ink and seasoned with garlic, salt and pepper formed in a hair-braid extension with a fine twist of the ribbon.


8. Those included in the present classification
Stuffed birds rest on black bread made from pastis, active coal and fennel. Resembling a 'kalhygge' (the Swedish word for part of the forest where the trees have been cut down) the bread stumps are surrounded by a burning sauce of stroh rom.


9. Those that tremble as if they were mad
Hollands most beautiful taxidermied deer head is ornamented with baked horns. These horns are a version of the Italian grissini, baked with olive oil and seasoned with flake salt and a touch of seaweed lemon. Be careful, but do break them off and taste them. For reference see monstrorum/perückenbock.

10. Innumerable ones
A fountain-fondue with a beet-root cream to soak those fried asian shrimps into.


11. Those drawn with a very fine camelhair brush
Flower arrangement of edible flowers, including the Szechuan mouth-numbing bud on a bed of pine-tree jelly.

12. Others (zie foto bovenaan)
The octopus is joined by his smaller relative the squid, cooked in garlic, bay leaves, chili, thyme, lemon, and wine served with assorted melons.

13. Those who have just broken a flower vase (zie foto bij 'Fabulous ones')
A classic Delft blue vase, exploding in a Dutch chees bridal gown shape.

14. Those that from a long way off look like flies
A transparent jelly made of elderberry flower, filled with a biblical swarm of oven-baked chili/lemon grasshoppers.